Author: DFShow

Cat Survives 30 Minutes In Washing Machine

May 19, 2013 - Top Stories

Next time I’ll use my paws.

From The Sun…

Lauren, 22, then tipped the load into the washing machine and put it on a full colour wash without spotting her inside. When she opened the washing machine half-an-hour later Gollum fell out unconscious. Horrified Lauren, of Larkfield, Kent, said: “When I saw her I was devastated. She was meowing so faintly I could barely hear it, and she was hardly breathing. It was just so unexpected. Lauren rushed the tortoiseshell to a nearby vets’ clinic. Gollum was so cold and had so much fluid around her lungs that it took an hour to raise her temperature. But after being fitted with a drip the wet pet eventually came to and returned home the same night. Lauren added: “She is practically back to her normal self. “I’m so grateful to the vets for saving her life.” Verity Page, practice manager at Sandhole Vets, said: “She is an amazing little kitten. She is like a miracle case. We are amazed she survived.”

Why Apple Hates America

May 19, 2013 - Top Stories

Apple’s secret to record profits? Not paying taxes. Yet the IRS is worried about the Tea Party?

We keep talking about how Apple doesn’t pay any taxes in the United States. Now it doesn’t want to pay taxes on the money it doesn’t even report to the IRS. It wants what is called a “Tax Holiday.” This way it can bring the billions in the Cayman Islands back to America. Looks like that money already had a holiday. The government is broke and yet it’s providing tax breaks to the most profitable company on the planet. Washington needs to get its head examined right after it examines Apple’s books. If Apple CEO Tim Cook doesn’t want to pay taxes then he should treat himself like a job and move overseas.

From the Guardian…

Companies had a tax holiday once before, in 2004, when a set of major corporations were allowed to bring back their overseas profits at a tax rate of only 5.25%. You might imagine that it resulted in an enormous economic boost, but here’s what happened instead, in the words of Treasury official Michael Mundaca:”There is no evidence that it increased US investment or jobs, and it cost taxpayers billions … the nonpartisan Congressional Research Service reports that most of the largest beneficiaries of the holiday actually cut jobs in 2005-06 – despite overall economy-wide job growth in those years – and many used the repatriated funds simply to repurchase stock or pay dividends.”

Brooklyn Bar Holding Smallest Penis Contest

May 19, 2013 - Top Stories

I’m guessing it’s an Irish bar.

From Gothamist

“The Contest” will be held on Saturday, July 20th starting at 5 p.m. at the bar, located at 286 Siegel Street near the Morgan Avenue L train. The event is open to anyone 21 and over; photo and video submissions will not be accepted, no matter how much you want to send them. Oddly, you don’t have to worry about being completely nude, even if you are totally proud of your lilliputian penis: “While nudity is not required, contestants should expect to wear wet underwear (which will be provided).”

Bea Arthur Nude

May 19, 2013 - Top Stories

Apparently she was a Bea cup.

A 1991 portrait of a nude Bea Arthur fetched nearly two millions dollars at an LA auction last week. It would have fetched double had she been clothed. This is an excellent piece to put over your fireplace and then pray that it falls in.

From the LA Times…

Nestled among the highly valued works of art was Currin’s “Bea Arthur Nude,” an oil painting that depicts “The Golden Girls” actress, who died in 2009, with her breasts bared. The piece had been expected to bring in $1.8 million to $2.5 million.

GOP Finds Another Dumb Black Guy

May 19, 2013 - Top Stories

One day the GOP will run out of stupid black men to front their hate group.

Republicans couldn’t find Bin Laden, but somehow they’re always able to find another black politician stupid enough to think the party of Lincoln hasn’t become the party of Jefferson Davis.

Meet E.W. Jackson from Virginia, a Harvard Law graduate, who sees no difference between Planned Parenthood and the KKK. If you’re going by the dirty white sheets, yeah, I see the similarity. The rest is just idiocy. He’s running for governor of Virginia.

From Politico…

The newly minted Republican nominee for lieutenant governor of Virginia once compared Planned Parenthood to the Ku Klux Klan and bemoaned black voters’ “slavish devotion” to the Democratic Party — past statements that are likely to inflame the culture-war politics of the state’s 2013 elections.

Adultery OK If You’re An American

May 18, 2013 - Top Stories, Uncategorized

The Reverend Pat Robertson seen here peeing in his Coke.

On the 700 Club this week Pat Robertson told a woman that it’s only natural for her husband to cheat, because “men wander.”

Then he says…

“What you have to do is say, ‘My husband was captured and I want to get him free,’” Robertson said, concluding that the woman should still be grateful that she lives in America: “Begin to thank God that you have a marriage that is together and that you live in America and good things are happening.”

Honey? I banged your sister for one reason. We live in the greatest country on God’s green earth. Can I borrow a twenty for beer?

Robertson Tells Woman Whose Husband Cheated to Remember ‘He’s a Man’ and be Grateful She Lives in America | Right Wing Watch.

The David Feldman Show

The David Feldman Show

Author: DFShow

Cat Survives 30 Minutes In Washing Machine

Why Apple Hates America

Brooklyn Bar Holding Smallest Penis Contest

Bea Arthur Nude

GOP Finds Another Dumb Black Guy

Adultery OK If You’re An American

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